Please, Don’t Touch Anything Steam Revenue & Sales Estimates

Based on our analysis using the Boxleiter method, we estimate Please, Don’t Touch Anything's total gross revenue on Steam at approximately $744,655.

This estimate comes with a confidence range:

• Conservative estimate (x20): $480,423
• Calibrated midpoint (x31): $744,655
• Optimistic estimate (x60): $1,441,268

The actual revenue may vary due to regional pricing, seasonal discounts, and refund rates.

With 5,291 Steam reviews and a 89% positive rating, we estimate Please, Don’t Touch Anything has sold between 105,820 and 317,460 copies, with a best estimate of 164,021.

This is based on the Boxleiter method, which uses the observation that roughly 1 in every 20 to 60 buyers leaves a Steam review. For the midpoint we do not assume a universal 30x value; we use a calibrated multiplier of x31 that adjusts for the title's age, price tier, genre, and review profile.

After Steam's tiered platform fee of effectively 30.0%, Four Quarters keeps an estimated $521,259 from Please, Don’t Touch Anything's gross revenue of $744,655.

Here's the breakdown:

• Gross Revenue: $744,655
• Steam's Fee (30.0%): -$223,397
• Developer Revenue: $521,259

Note: This doesn't account for publisher shares, taxes, or development costs.

Steam uses a tiered revenue sharing model that reduces the platform's cut as a game earns more:

• First $10 million: 30% to Steam, 70% to developer
• $10M to $50M: 25% to Steam, 75% to developer
• Above $50M: 20% to Steam, 80% to developer

For Please, Don’t Touch Anything, with an estimated gross revenue of $744,655, this results in an effective rate of 30.0%. Steam keeps approximately $223,397 and Four Quarters receives $521,259.

These estimates use the Boxleiter method, a widely-used industry approach that estimates game sales from the number of Steam reviews.

Factors that affect accuracy:

• Review-to-purchase ratio varies by genre
• Discount history - games with frequent deep sales may have higher ratios
• Regional pricing - different prices in different markets are not captured
• Refunds - Steam's return policy means some counted sales were refunded
• Bundled sales - keys sold through third-party bundles may not generate reviews

We provide a confidence range ($480,423 to $1,441,268) to reflect this uncertainty. For the best estimate we combine the Boxleiter range with a calibrated midpoint (x31) and a calibrated ASP of $5.

If Please, Don’t Touch Anything generated the same gross revenue on the Epic Games Store, Four Quarters would keep approximately $744,655 - that's $223,397 more than on Steam.

At this revenue level, Epic's concrete platform fee would be $0. Epic charges 0% on the first $1 million in annual per-app revenue and then 12% on the remaining amount. On GOG (30% cut), the developer would earn approximately $521,259.

Note: This is a hypothetical comparison. Actual sales volumes differ significantly between platforms, and Steam's larger user base typically drives substantially higher sales.

According to SteamSpy data, players spend an average of 2.8 hours in Please, Don’t Touch Anything, with a median playtime of 1.8 hours. This indicates solid player engagement.